yuliano lorenzo

yuliano lorenzo

My name is yuliano lorenzo I was born in Cuba on July 2 in 1991. I was born in a middle-class family. My family was the typical one; mom, dad, grandpas, grandmas, uncles, aunts, etc. The development of my abilities as a baby was in a good way. I walked and said my first words by the time that every baby is supposed to do these actions. My parents get divorced by the age of 3 years old, but this did not affect me in any way. I think this happened because the way they keep doing everything with me. I received a lot of love and attentions from both sides. They kept a really good communication and the best relationship, so I lived in a peaceful environment all the time. Since I was very young I established a strong connection with my dad, even if I love my mom. Even if my dad was in my life always I started growing up with a single mother, so that was an important factor for the rest of my life. Some years after my parents broke up my dad got married with another woman and they had a baby girl by the time I was 6 years old. My mom also got married but she never had a baby again. The worst part of my life was when my dad left the country looking for a better economic situation for me and my little sister. I understand him now that I am an adult but, in those times, I was really affected. I went through psychological treatments that helped me to handle out the situation. It was weird for me why the separation process was normal, but the absence of my dad was hard. Now at this point in my life I understand it, when a child goes through a break up between the parents it is important the way they do the things respect to the infant. A year after my dad left, also my little sister moved with him. That was another remarkable success in my life because I love my sister, even if we are not from the same mother. I suffered asthma since I was a baby. There are a lot of people in my family with the same condition, so it was a hereditary illness. Apart the asthma I was a healthy kid.

I started school by the age of 5 years old, this is the age to start school in my country. Since my beginnings I learned fast, so I developed skills that helped me to be a good student. I was affected at school by the time my dad’s left. This happened when I was in fourth grade. Thankfully my learning was not affected, even if I refused to go to school. Also, it was a short period of time to go over that situation. I was always interested in arts and sports. I used to draw, I got it from my dad, and I learned to dance so young thanks of my mom. I started practicing sports when I was like 11 years, so in that way I got rid of asthma, this was a good step in my life span development. I never had any issue with speaking or acting in front of people, I never have had scenic panic. During my childhood the environment in my house was excellent in both sides of my family. Even if I was the only kid my mom never treated me with any difference. She was always strict with my education and she always taught me the correct way to act in society. She used to check my grades, class notes, homework, projects, so she settled responsibility as a fundamental part of my personality. My childhood was full of good moments and achievements, but without my dad, just pictures and weekly calls were my communication with him.

Adolescence was a little hard for me in some points because my mom did a great job trying to be a guidance during this period, but, it is important for a boy his dad’s presence when adolescence comes. I remember when my body started changing, the first change was the pubic hair, then the hair in my legs. Just about hair in the beginnings. Another significant change was the variation in my eight, from my 11s to my 14s my stature changed significantly. My voice became strong. It was weird at the beginning because I still felt like a kid, but my body was not like that anymore. My hormones were so excited all the time, I felt full of energy and most of the time my brain just thought about sex, no more toys in my mind. I got my first ejaculation (supermache) when I was like 12 years, I guess. Since that moment I started experimenting new sensations inside myself, I began discovering my body. My nutrition during this period was good because was out of fast or junk foods. I am from a country where is normal that a 15 or 16 years old boy uses alcohol or cigars, so I drank alcohol beverages for first time when I was 16 years old. One more time we can see how the culture of the country can affect the development of a person. I used to participate not only in cultural or sport events, also I was part of academic events, getting a kind of scholarship for my high school classes. My first relationship was when I was 17. She was my first girlfriend and my first sexual relationship also. I made a lot of mistakes with this girl, reason number one the inexperience, and reason number two I did not have a male guidance. I never had any problems with sexual infections or pregnancy because I always used protection, old habit that I keep as an adult. I was not the “popular” boy of the school, but I was not the “loser” one neither. I think the reason is because I was always sure about my personality, and in Cuba bulling is not as hard as it is here in the United States. In addition, teens there do not have access to social media like here. When I was in high school I lost my grandma from my dad’s side, it was hard for me because we were so close. I was enlisted in the army when I was 18 because in Cuba is obligatory even if you are going to the university, you must serve a minimum of a year. During this period, I learned how to be more organized an independent. After a year serving for the army I went to the university.

By the time I was in the university I was in my early 20’s. How easy was the life till that point, when my only preoccupations were my new pair of shoes and the new way to use a haircut? Then you started to see new issues in your environment, thanks brain development, now my life is getting more complicated. The situation in my country is bad, the basic resources for a simple life don’t exist, people live like real zombies going forward without any goal. One more time I had to thanks to my brain and to my common sense but this time for help me to find the solution for a life like that. When I was 22 I made the most difficult decision in my life, but I don’t feel any regret because was the only way to get a better life for me and my mom. In my second year of university I decided to leave Cuba and come to this country with my dad. The only important thing that I did in these two years was to improve my knowledges at school. Like I said was a hard decision because I was leaving my mom behind, but I see this as an important objective in my future life, get my mom to here with me. I moved to united states in 2014, and since my first day in this country I loved it. I have been in united states for four years right now. I feel so confident because I have earned a lot of significant achievements during this time. I got a job at the third month being here, I also started college after my first year in the country. During my time in college I have learned the native language and I started my associate classes based in my major that is pharmacy. This four years have been for recovering the lost time with my dad.

I finished my college degree by the time I was 28 years old. That day was mix of sadness and happiness at the same time because for the first time in my life I was living an important moment of my life with my dad and my little sister, but now my mom wasn’t there, life is complicated. After my graduation I moved to FIU to continue with my bachelor’s degree. That year was great because I accomplished one of the most important goals in my life, becoming a citizen of this country. By the time I completed my bachelor’s degree at FIU I was 30 years old, then I transferred to my favorite medicine school and the one I was dreaming about it since college. At my second year at Nova University I knew a girl I never thought she would be someone important in my life. It was funny because our relationship was problematic since the beginnings we used to fight for everything. In those times was a little annoying because I thought she wasn’t the right one, and I was disappointed because I liked her. Whit the pass of the time I understand those fights were a part of our characters. After that relationship I learned when a relationship starts with differences and keeps going, that’s a true relationship. One year before finishing my career I took my mom from Cuba, so at this point my list of goals would be almost done. One more step in my way to success.

After my graduation I lived hard times. I used to think after finishing school all my problems would be solved, but another life with other problems was starting. I still remember that first year post graduation, a year full of work applications and resumes and just one word as answer “Experience”, the most common issue for every graduated. That year was hard because I had my first kid also, but like my dad says bad days are not forever, and after the storm only peace comes. After that year I started working at a hospital as a doctor in pharmacy, that desirable position that I always wanted. I had my second kid by the time the older one was 5 years old, this time was a little girl and my princess. Do you remember that problematic girl in my seco9nd year of university? She is the mother of my two kids and hopefully no more stupid differences between us. Adulthood also has a big price to pay, parents are not forever. After I lost my parents life changed for me, now I see it like they used to see when I was a kid.

Wow how much have changed my life. Now at my 60’s everything is like in slow motion, now I’m not rush for anything. It is like I’m just waiting for my final rest. I’m a grandpa of three kids, and even if I have a good relationship with my son and my daughter I barely see them. They are now living those days when I was the busy one. The only company that I have is my wife, our dog, and asthma problems, an old partner from my kid days. It is funny, now I feel like I’m getting back to my childhood, when I was dependent of others. Everyday my lunges got worst, I couldn’t almost breath without help. Well I just reserved my last breath to complete this article somebody is waiting form in the other side of the light. At the end asthma won, I beat it when I was a boy, but now it took me out. Bye

References:

Lorenzo Yuliano, (2018). Personal Interview.

Book

Discovering the Life Span Fourth Edition Robert S. Feldman(author)

University of Massachusetts Amherst

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